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Date CreatedMarch 4, 2023
First Namewendy
Email OR Phone Number267-218-0951
Zip Code (we want to match where you live with your members of Congress)19060
Tell us a little about yourself or your loved one:
Q1: What was your situation when you or your loved one first started experiencing elder abuse, neglect, and/or fraud? (What was your/their living situation like, were you/they struggling with any health issues, etc.?)

After the sudden death of my father in March 2018, my mother returned from Pennsylvania back to her primary residence in Florida. My parents also owned property in Ocean City NJ, where they resided during the summer months. Upon returning to Florida my mother redid her will and estate, as well as adding both myself and sister to both her bank accounts. Both my sister and I reside in Pennsylvania. During early 2020, she was experiencing depression and anxiety but insisted she was OK and wanted to remain in Florida. We spoke every day. She was seeing doctors in Florida and working on different medications. Shortly after the covid 19 pandemic occured my mother called me and said she was in Ocean City NJ. She told me that my sister and brother in law went down unexpectedly as a surprise to bring her up to her NJ home. A few months later she was upset that her electric bill was over 500 dollars and she told me she was calling the electric company. As my sister and her family were at the shore those months I told her that was probably the reason. She didn't want to say anything. My mother was scheduled to see a neurologist in late August. Earlier in August, my mother told me that my sister made a room for her at her house. She believed this was to make it easier for my sister to take her to the upcoming doctor appointment. I went over to see her and her room. I thought it was good for her to be around people rather than alone in Florida or New Jersey. It was the middle of covid and the only person wearing a mask was my mother in her room. When my nephew arrived he did not have a mask. Neither did my niece. My mother told me that she just stayed in her room and always wore her mask. We were both a little concerned but again she didn't want to say anything. Due to covid I was told that I could not attend the appointment only one person was allowed to go. She called me after and said the neurologist wanted some testing done, which was scheduled for late August. Although I asked my sister to please keep me informed, she did not. Most of my information was given to me by my mom. It was difficult visiting her with covid so we mostly talked on the phone all the time. After she had the testing the neurologists provided a 19 page written report, which they also went over in depth with my sister present. My mother told my sister to email me a copy of the report. She called me after the appointment and was a little upset because she couldn't drive anymore. Her diagnosis was dimentia. The report noted multiple things, one being at risk for both benevolent exploitation as well as by others. Her cognitive abilities were very impaired and she needed help in decision making. Several suggestions were made, including that she was not to be alone. It was suggested that a home care person be hired. I was told that they had it covered. However, it was evident that every time I spoke to her she was alone. My mom did not want me to say anything. Shortly after, my mom called me and said she just got back from the hospital. She fell down the steps and broke her ankle, she had to call 911 as again no one was there. She now had to have physical therapy. Then in November of 2020 she called me from the shore and said that my sister had covid so my niece took her to the shore. It was just a matter of time. I have no idea what they were doing with her at this point. I think they took her to a testing site and she was now positive also as well as my sisters husband and daughter. In December, my mother called me upset that her eyes itched and she didn't have an eye doctor in PA. Again, no one was there. I told her I would call her back and called my eye doctor's office who scheduled a tele appointment for later that day. She called me after the appointment and thanked me she really liked the doctor and he said it was common for covid to spread to the eyes. A couple days later I asked her how the drops were working and she said she didn't have them yet. I couldn't beleive it. No one was there. I told her I would go get them and leave on the step but she seemed afraid and told me no she thought someone was picking them up that day. She never wanted me to say anything. I now know why. In March 2021, she told me she was going to a new doctor in Springfield because she didn't have a family doctor here in PA. She called me after the doctor and told me her blood work was good and the doctor also gave her xanax. Knowing that medication was not recommended and specifically mentioned in the 19 page report of August 2020, I was starting to get concerned. We had plans in May if covid was less restrictive to spend some time at the shore together for my birthday. Prior to my birthday my mom asked if we could reschedule the shore but wanted me to come over on my birthday. I went to see her on May 14, 2021 that afternoon. We sat outside talking and I noticed at times she had a blank stare. Something seemed wrong. My sister came home and they were in a rush to go to the shore. My mom said things were not going well and she had 2 doctors appointment the following Monday and Tuesday. I asked her if I could take her and she said she would really like that. I hugged her and left. This was a Friday. I called her Sunday at about 10 PM, hoping it wasn't too late. She said no she was still up. Something didn't seem right and I wanted to make sure she was OK. When I asked her if I could take her to the doctor I could hear my neice in the background saying "tell her you have a ride". She told me I could take her to the next one.
Later that week she called and mentioned that my sister and brother in law were talking about buying her Florida house so she could help me. I didn't need any help and I told her I did not think it was a good idea right now. After being hung up on several times all of a sudden my calls went straight to her voicemail without ringing. My sister had her at the shore. This continued for several days and then I learned that my number was blocked from her phone. Being unable to contact her I became pretty upset. My sister then used the police to keep me from seeing her at her home and I was told that I would have to go through the court system because my sister said something to them about on going problems. Although I told the officier I was being kept from my mother who had dementia by my sister. Unsure what to do, several attorneys said that it was imperitive to contact COSA, the local agency in my area. I was a little hesitant because I didn't want to hurt my mom. I thought to myself no one can keep a person from their mom this is crazy. Then I received a notice in the mail that a PFA was denied. I couldn't believe it. Unsure of what was going on I thought I better let her attorney know in an effort to protect her estate from anything happening so I emailed the attorney informing him of her condition and mention of selling her house in which I was a 50% beneficiary. He replied asking me the names and then told me he couldn't speak to me as I was not his client. Then my phone which was on a family plan with my mom was cancelled. They had access to my phone, my mother's phone, her emails, her properties which locks were changed, and continued to isolate my mother from all communication with me. I was able to get my number back from AT T on June 18, 2021 at which time I decided to stop at both of my mothers banks to see if any changes were made. One bank told me I didn't exist and could not tell me anything else. The second bank told me that all my access was changed and I was not even authorized to make a balance inquiry, but was still on the account. He further said that if he were me he would run to a lawyer. I could not believe this was happening. At this point I did contact COSA, which was supposed to be confidential. I was told an investigation including bank accounts would be done. Then all of a sudden police were storming up my house because a call was made saying I was going to commit suicide. I told them what was going on and again was ignored. This was the first false police report. The day the investigator went to the home, the police again were called with lies about texting threats of killing myself to my mother. No such texts exist. All the while being told this is a civil matter. My friend thought I better go to the District Attorney's office so he drove me up there. The woman there was a disgrace to say the least. It was to much effort for her to write anything down let alone listen to what was happening. It was very deeming and unfriendly and this was supposed to be the person in charge of the so called "elder exploitation unit". What a sad experience. I received multiple nasty messages from my mothers phone as if it was her now accusing me of multiple criminal things and threats to file charges. I continued to receive threats from a relative in Wisconsin, which my lawyer was able to find out who the number belonged to. I noticed on facebook that every family relative disappeared, cousins I haven't talked to in years. Although, I went to the police about the false reports no one could do anything about it. What is scary is that they could actually use my sick mother to say or do anything. After following up with COSA I became very uncomfortable and hired an attorney. Til this day, my phone receives non stop messages from unknow numbers, email texts with explicite content, and all types of things. My mom was my best friend and only family I had left. When I texted my sister asking why her bank accounts were changed, they actually had her call me then took the phone and started screaming oh my god your stealing moms money. I knew now that this was real and my mother was being lied to. The worst part is nobody could help her or me. Then unsure where they had her I called to have a wellness check done. The police officier told me she was OK but never even saw her. Can you imagine. This is a person's loved one and my mother was not there she was in Florida with my sister. Knowing something didn't seem right the next day I called both New Jersey and Florida and Florida was able to confirm that she was at the Florida residence with my sisters family. That week in Florida, my sister took her to the attorney. She was actually the one who drove her there flew her there having full knowledge of the 19 page neurology report and being present at all doctors appointments knowing my mother's disease progressed, while isolating her from her other daughter, and provided a note with one sentence from a different doctor and changed everything on my mother's estate to herself and added her husband to my mothers financial power of attorney. She was now 100% beneficiary of my mothers home in Florida. She didn't stop there though. My father's pension beneficiaries were changed to her children and I was removed from my mom's 401k making my sister 100% of excess of 40,000 dollars. These changes all were made via email communications from my mother's email, which my sister had control of. It did not stop after Florida. I still am not sure about my parent's property in Ocean City. Sadly, as of today and my many attempts for justice my mother still resides with the very abusers who did this. I was attacked for contacting COSA, which I thought was confidential and treated like a criminal throughout the entire court proceeding. Every effort taken failed. No one did anything to help my mom or myself. In fact, doctors wrote letters saying that my mother said I was stealing her money. How pathetic is that. Of course, they will all be reported. Dispite the fact that a second doctor confirmed everything from the original August 2020 report my mother continues to be a victim and remains residing with the very people who did this. My mom continues to be isolated from her daughter knowing the damage caused by such isolation. She continues to be told lies about me so she will say "she doesn't want to see me" despite her progressive dimentia. So when I hear about how all this progress has been made and new task forces focusing on exploiting an elder, it makes me sick. I was forced to testify that I called COSA, which again is CONFIDENTIAL. Their own doctor who wrote a paragraph in his report of what my sister said defaming me with lies and then added his own opinion stating I sounded drunk on a phone message she played for him. This was during an evaluation in which this same doctor said my mom was fine but yet she didn't pass a single test. This is the very agency who is supposed to help my mom. My mother continues to be isolated from me. May of this year will now be 2 years. Evil does not describe what has happened. This is beyond sick and unthinkable. No amount of money can ever give me the time lost with my mother.

Q2: What would you like to share about your story?

EVERYTHING

Q3: What do you wish people knew about elder abuse, neglect, and fraud?

Be careful trust no one

Q4: What are your hopes for the future?

How it is that a person can be prevented from seeing a parent, and for no reason at all be denied any information regarding their parent's health is unconstitutional. I would like to know how that can happen. A child should not have to pay attorney's to see their parent who they had a healthy loving relationship with. The second a person can not reach their parent something should be done immediately by law enforcement. I am sorry to say that Pennsylvania has failed my mother and myself and I live with emptiness and sadness and will probably never see my mom again. I want everyone to know what has happened to me and my mom and how every effort I took failed. I want answers myself as to how this can happen. I am not sure what my hopes are other than people who do this belong in jail. Not in civil court. There has to be a remedy of prison. I will continue to fight for my mother's justice. I want people to know the truth. Not a single agency helped. NOT ONE!!!!!! Please tell me who I can contact for help. Can congress help? Who? I would like to know.

Can our staff follow up with you about your story?Yes
Are you interested in sharing your story further? (We can contact you about speaking with local media, elected officials, or recording your story for a video or podcast)Yes
Can we use your name in telling your story?Yes
Is there anything else you would like to add?

Help me tell my story

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