In 2013 my elderly father, living in his house was experiencing progressive worsening symptoms of Dementia. My younger son was living with him at the time and trying to help as best he could. Son alerted me that my father was on a decline, leaving stove on, doors unlocked, etc. There were neighbors/former co-workers, a girlfriend going out to eat, bank, etc. with him. My son questioned the relationship with these folks and warned me about this. I contacted his doctors' and they both wrote notes to me stating my father may need assistance, as his health was declining and my presence would be helpful if I could be stationed nearer to him. The military was kind enough to issue me orders, shortening my tour, and allowing me to transfer to a unit very close to his home.

After several months in my father's home, cleaning, cooking, doing everything I could to help him while focusing on my full time military career, the situation became stressful. My father insisted he needed no one's help, and that he was fine. He also made the same statements after we visited his primary care doctor, and his attorney. He suddenly became resentful, hostile, and told me and spouse to move out, ASAP. I had some medical issues at the time, and had no place to go with my household goods in storage. My spouse and I ended up in an Extended Stay, in a nearby town. Then, a couple of months later my son was locked out of the house and had access a window upstairs to gather his belongings and leave as well.

As we left his house on less than favorable terms, and I told my father I would only return if there was some emergency and would soon retire to another state. These friends, neighbors, former Federal Co-workers and his girlfriend kept coming to my father's home. They were all given keys to everything and my father seemed to trust all these people, and was always showing them into the house and showing them around. He was missing my mother, who died in 2010 and liked to show off her fine silver, china, and things she had inherited from back 3 generations in her family. She still had jewelry, antique mahogany furniture, and everything she had kept from her families treasured items. There was inherited money in the bank, and my father had a cache of weapons in the house and garage for safety reasons.
I sent a few cards, tried to call him over the years, and no answer. In early 2000, there was a call from a longtime friend of the family (a nurse) who said she had received disturbing late night calls from my father recently. She wanted to know if I was aware of his situation, and I did not being that I had not heard from him since we left. The family friend stated that when COVID hit, she found him alone, dirty, and that almost everything in his house, packed garage was gone! I wanted to talk to him and see him, but knew this was not the right time to travel as the virus was keeping everyone at home. After 4 months, I got another call from an older son who told me the rest of his garage was being emptied of all of his machinery, tools, tanks, massive saws, milling machine, drill presses, years of mechanical and technical books he saved. Weapons were also taken, and values stashed in the garage.

Once I was able to travel to Virginia in early May of 2020, I was able to talk to my father, who told me, "You stole money from my banking/savings account". I asked him for details, he wasn't sure, except to say that the bank was presented with a note and other documents by someone who said they were me and my husband, and my mother's only next of kin, and withdrew all the money in the account. After hearing this I called the bank fraud line and reported my concerns, then visited the bank branch where this happened, and tried to report identity theft, and Elderly Financial Fraud. I also reported everything to local police, state police, Dept of State for my mother's missing passport, Social Services, and began making a list of all that was gone from his home as best as I could remember. Not one agency, seemed interested in helping me because I wasn't the victim! I was only his daughter, so this was hearsay, and not really considered a valid claim. After visiting his attorney's office, I found out that he knew what had happened, but also did not seem to care about the Elder Fraud and Abuse, not reporting any of this to the authorities! At one point in a follow up phone call to the attorney, he stated he was "working on it". I never received followup, nor any help from anyone in the system. This seems as if, at least in the State of Virginia, that if the victim doesn't report these crimes, then it never happened. Please understand that I do not wish revenge for the perpetrators, only justice be served on these folks who committed horrible acts of crime towards my vulnerable, elderly father. The things taken, nearly everything were family heirlooms, precious things that were to be passed down to our small, existing family, me and my sons!

If persons like these so called, friends, neighbors, a girlfriend, even Federally retired co-workers, are not stopped, they will continue to target the elderly and I believe they will continue to profit and not be held accountable until they meet their judgement day when they die. Social Services was not even aware of an online course that can be taken in the event of elderly crimes, I took the training, then asked the agency if they had taken the Online Reporting Criteria course for Elderly Fraud & Abuse, and the Supervisor at this Social Services said no!

Laws must be strengthened to protect, report, and hold anyone accountable of known Elder Fraud, by family, especially next of kin!
Reporting: If everyone is held accountable, Attorneys (especially Elder Attorneys), Health Care workers, Bystanders who suspect a crime, business vendors, banks and their officials, we might get this type of criminal activity under control one day!