| May 18, 2023 | Sharon Anderson | | spinnashayykayy@gmail.com | My father's Sister,Daughter,and his POA forged signatures stealing all of childrens inheritance, properties, and starved, abused, and put pills in his mouth, Killing him. I went to his home, and was attacked by his So called POA,, wife and brother with a gun, beating me, telling me they were going to kill me like they did my dad, they killed my family!! And will kill me, when they catch me
| | | | Yes | Yes | Yes | They shot and killed my 17 yr old son and covered it up as suicide in Livingston parish Louisiana, with all along with all my possessions being stolen and the sheriff said,that the evidence that I have was probably contaminated. They all got away with murder, crime, human trafficking, stealing peoples properties, bank account, Inheritances
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| May 18, 2023 | Sharon Anderson | | spinnashayykayy@gmail.com | My father's Sister,Daughter,and his POA forged signatures stealing all of childrens inheritance, properties, and starved, abused, and put pills in his mouth, Killing him. I went to his home, and was attacked by his So called POA,, wife and brother with a gun, beating me, telling me they were going to kill me like they did my dad, they killed my family!! And will kill me, when they catch me
| | | | Yes | Yes | Yes | They shot and killed my 17 yr old son and covered it up as suicide in Livingston parish Louisiana, with all along with all my possessions being stolen and the sheriff said,that the evidence that I have was probably contaminated. They all got away with murder, crime, human trafficking, stealing peoples properties, bank account, Inheritances
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| May 26, 2023 | Steve | 92223 | smehl1506@aol.com | Hacked computer. Nearly cost us thousands of dollars.
| Received a pop-up notice allegedly from Apple (Apple does NOT send these) stating that my computer was hacked. The notice told me to call a rep. The rep gave his full name and false Apple ID number. (Real Apple reps don't do that). He suggested my bank account may have also been hacked. He asked me to give the toll-free bank member service number, which I did. (Golden 1 Credit Union). He said he would transfer me to a customer service rep at the bank. The person who answered was NOT a customer service rep. He told me my checking account had been hacked for more than $15,000. He said the only way to stop it was to withdraw $15,000 from my account and await further instructions. Fortunately, by that time, I got suspicious. So I visited my branch and talked to the manager. He agreed that this was a scam. I gave the names of the fraudulent agents and their phone numbers to the FTC.
| | | Yes | Yes | No | |
| May 4, 2026 | Alice | 32606 or 32605 Gainesville Fl. The Atrium | (904)430-3672 | | | | | | | | |
| October 21, 2022 | Virginia | 24523 | mexicoginny@yahoo.com | My husband (now deceased) and I bought a house at a local retirement community that advertised care and various conditions that never existed.
Their fraudulent advertising continues to this day and to add insult to injury they are using pictures of us on line to promote continued sales of said properties! We had no knowledge they were being used! We moved but they continue using our ‘likeness’ to sell properties to other unsuspecting seniors- a violation of federal law - and they are getting away with it! I reported them to BBB but their false advertising continues! Thanks for helping seniors who are being victimized! I will gladly testify to the above facts.
| | | My hope is to see the government help seniors who are being victimized.
| Yes | Yes | Yes | I am more than happy to testify to the above facts. I have documents that will show what happened and is continuing to happen. Please contact me 🙏
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| November 11, 2023 | | | | I am a senior citizen who lives in Rhode Island is a victim of power-based abuse. My daughter attacked me a fee weeks ago and was arrested. I am trying to flee but I haven't any income. I am living in an apartment without heat and sleeping on the floor. The abusers are her father's celebrant family. I need help.
| | | | No | Yes | | |
| October 12, 2023 | Marilyn Ingram | 27217 | ije061065@gmail.com | | | | | Yes | Yes | Yes | My situation concerns my 87 yr old mother who has a guardian under what I consider fraudulent circumstances. Her guardian (nephew) has abused his power and authority. Has a civic suit against me alleging all sorts of things. He was ultimately granted a preliminary injunction against me without the benefit of being heard that basically denies my mother and I access to one another. This case has been ongoing since March 28th.2022. My mother was taken from our home on May 18th 23 allegedly for her safety/ protection from me, but ultimately returned on August 31th. 23.
Present circumstances, she was taken by EMS to the emergency room on 10-10-23 and I've been banned from seeing or speaking to her, without anything warranting sure actions by the guardian.
I've made reports after reports to no avail.
My mother was diagnosed with dementia 6-30-22 and the torture/ torment she has suffered at the hands of her guardian, her son and a woman she legally placed up for adoption 66 yrs. Ago
This has been absolutely the most horrifying experience for first and foremost, my mom and myself.
I have compelling/ Conclusive evidence to support my statements.
There has been no interest in the well being/ best interest of my mother. Their only concern has been property that was gifted to me by my mother and the plaintiff, her son and the legally adopted woman have been after.
So much more to this horrific story.
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| February 29, 2024 | michelyne kuykendall | 94507 | michelynek@gmail.com | My father is 87 years he lives in contra costa county he worked hard his entire life set up his retirement and believed he would be able to spend the rest of his life enjoying it. But that did not happen, my father was almost killed by a women who over dosed him with pills in the attempt to try and kill him as he was worth alot to her dead she had changed his trust documents with her attorney she took many life insurance policies out on him. I was contacted by a family friend who witnessed all this he got concerned about his safety and called me, my father ws not in good shape he was taken to walnut creek kaiser as he was so drugged up that he could not even walk we have reports from kaiser stating unknown pills where in his system. this women jill moses got scared and thought she was going to jail so she went and got a attorney and with out no notice to my father and family he was placed under a conservertership our contra costa county superior court is the most corrupt department Judge Virgina George and her clan of corrupt attorneys Konstaintine demiris, joe morell, lara heisler, Terrence murphy John Balquest, Mathew talbot, which we have proved everything that lara heisler and jill moses had stated but they keep it all going we have spent our life savings to theses attorneys all for doing nothing they even made me sign documents giving up any inheritence i might have gotten they are now wanting over 600,000 in more fees and these people have done nothing, MY FATHER WAS ABUSED AND THE COURT SYSTEM DOES NOTHING ABOUT IT ACCEPT KEEP ABUSING THE VICTIM AND LET THE ABUSER GET AWAY WITH IT ALL SHE HAS DONE THIS TO SO MANY PEOPLE ALREADY OUR SYSTEM IS SO MESSED UP. I HAVE BEEN CONTACTED BY MANY OTHER VICTIMS THAT HAVE ALSO BEEN THROUGH PURE HELL THIS IS ORGANIZED CRIME AND NEEDS TO BE STOPPED.
I WOULD NOT WISH THIS ON ANYBODY THESE PEOPLE PRAY ON THE ELDERLY DISABLED AND CHILDREN THE MOST VULNERABLE PEOPLE IT NEEDS TO STOP. MY NAME IS MICHELYNE KUYKENDALL I DONT NEED TO BE PRIVATE I WILL DO ANYTHING TO STOP THIS ABUSE TO THE ELDERLY. MY NUMBER IS 925 206 8882
Thanks so much
Michelyne kuykendall
| THE CORRUPTION IN OUR CONTRA COSTA COUNTY SUPERIOR COURT DEPARTMENT 30
| | | Yes | Yes | Yes | I have so much evidence there is alot more to this story with evidence I also have many other victims that want to get there story out so hopefully we can stop the abuse in our court system
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| February 29, 2024 | michelyne kuykendall | 94507 | michelynek@gmail.com | My father is 87 years he lives in contra costa county he worked hard his entire life set up his retirement and believed he would be able to spend the rest of his life enjoying it. But that did not happen, my father was almost killed by a women who over dosed him with pills in the attempt to try and kill him as he was worth alot to her dead she had changed his trust documents with her attorney she took many life insurance policies out on him. I was contacted by a family friend who witnessed all this he got concerned about his safety and called me, my father ws not in good shape he was taken to walnut creek kaiser as he was so drugged up that he could not even walk we have reports from kaiser stating unknown pills where in his system. this women jill moses got scared and thought she was going to jail so she went and got a attorney and with out no notice to my father and family he was placed under a conservertership our contra costa county superior court is the most corrupt department Judge Virgina George and her clan of corrupt attorneys Konstaintine demiris, joe morell, lara heisler, Terrence murphy John Balquest, Mathew talbot, which we have proved everything that lara heisler and jill moses had stated but they keep it all going we have spent our life savings to theses attorneys all for doing nothing they even made me sign documents giving up any inheritence i might have gotten they are now wanting over 600,000 in more fees and these people have done nothing, MY FATHER WAS ABUSED AND THE COURT SYSTEM DOES NOTHING ABOUT IT ACCEPT KEEP ABUSING THE VICTIM AND LET THE ABUSER GET AWAY WITH IT ALL SHE HAS DONE THIS TO SO MANY PEOPLE ALREADY OUR SYSTEM IS SO MESSED UP. I HAVE BEEN CONTACTED BY MANY OTHER VICTIMS THAT HAVE ALSO BEEN THROUGH PURE HELL THIS IS ORGANIZED CRIME AND NEEDS TO BE STOPPED.
I WOULD NOT WISH THIS ON ANYBODY THESE PEOPLE PRAY ON THE ELDERLY DISABLED AND CHILDREN THE MOST VULNERABLE PEOPLE IT NEEDS TO STOP. MY NAME IS MICHELYNE KUYKENDALL I DONT NEED TO BE PRIVATE I WILL DO ANYTHING TO STOP THIS ABUSE TO THE ELDERLY. MY NUMBER IS 925 206 8882
Thanks so much
Michelyne kuykendall
| THE CORRUPTION IN OUR CONTRA COSTA COUNTY SUPERIOR COURT DEPARTMENT 30
| | | Yes | Yes | Yes | I have so much evidence there is alot more to this story with evidence I also have many other victims that want to get there story out so hopefully we can stop the abuse in our court system
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| December 21, 2023 | M | | | | | | | | | | |
| March 20, 2023 | Todd frieden | 63471 | Todd_Lisa1961@yahoo,com | Sis s plan poa trustee exe 5000 acre farm sold 2million farm machinery household house farm changed will took caddy she is tak n 50000000 in property need help real evil person
| | | | Yes | Yes | Yes | HELP
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| March 20, 2023 | Todd frieden | 63471 | Todd_Lisa1961@yahoo,com | Sis s plan poa trustee exe 5000 acre farm sold 2million farm machinery household house farm changed will took caddy she is tak n 50000000 in property need help real evil person
| | | | Yes | Yes | Yes | HELP
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| August 18, 2025 | Kaylee Clark | 55405 | kaylee@commercialcleanrsva.com | | | | | Yes | Yes | Yes | Hello - we were in the area recently, so I thought to reach out.
I work for a local janitorial service here in neighborhood and specialize in keeping spaces like yours clean and welcoming.
Would you like a fresh cleaning estimate for your cleaning requirements?
Looking forward to hearing from you,
Kaylee Clark
Business Development
Commercial Cleanrs Virginia
kaylee@commercialcleanrsva.com
Respond with stop to optout.
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| July 16, 2023 | Charles | 23111 | hiltonvillage2018@gmail.com | I am a 77-year-old retired geriatrician. I moved into a Continuing Care Retirement Community four years ago. I am enrolled in traditional fee-for-service Medicare. I am in relatively good health, although I have had an inguinal hernia repair and a total right hip replacement in the past two years. I am concerned about future healthcare.
I have become aware that private corporations are taking over Medicare (they plan to complete this by 2030) using an innovative program started by the Center for Medicare and Medicaid Innovation. It is currently called ACO REACH. This program will replace my traditional Medicare with an inferior privatized Medicare type of insurance.
As an academic internist with boards in internal medicine, geriatrics, and palliative medicine (when I retired in 2009), I helped a medical school set up a geriatrics training program, and we certainly taught and worked to confront elder abuse, neglect, and fraud.
There is a need to collect stories of how privatized care harms seniors and educate the public about this program.
| ACO REACH was started by Trump associates (a dormmate of Jerome Kirshner) expressly to place all of Medicare under private corporations. The initial program was called Direct Contracting. The details were worked out so that physicians would switch seniors' billings (invoices) from the government to private companies without the permission of seniors. Physicians were offered benefits, and they proved willing to switch. After all, physicians are underpaid by Medicare and feel no great allegiance to the program. This will have a devastating effect on the sickest of seniors. They will no longer have insurance. The program was renamed ACO REACH (under Biden) essentially to confuse both the public and physicians about the nature of the program. The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) supports this program. Only the Secretary of Health and Human Services can cancel it (according to legislation written to protect innovations). Wall Street stands to make billions of dollars (estimates are that they could keep 35% of government dollars). Politicians are being aggressively lobbied and given large donations. The public is in the dark.
| ACO REACH looks to be a significant future perpetrator of elder abuse, neglect, and fraud. It needs to be publicized, confronted and stopped. Most seniors learn of the program when they receive a letter from their physician practice telling them they are now under this new program. Their only recourse is to seek new providers. CMS uses a policy of "auto-aligning" patients to ACO REACH if one physician who has provided care is in the program and their billing exceeds 10%. Currently, seniors who find privatization under Medicare Advantage unacceptable can switch to traditional Medicare (although with problems obtaining Medicap coverage). This will go away. There will be no more traditional Medicare to switch to. CMS has announced plans to convert all of Medicare to ACO REACH by 2030. There is a difference between health insurance permitting physicians to order and prescribe what is needed and having a private company that decides what will be paid for.
| What is my hope? That the Senior Lobby would rise and make this an issue of national importance. Private companies use limited panels of providers, denials of service requests, and payment refusals to accomplish their goal - to profit from the government's funds. Medicare Advantage has cost the government more and cornered the mostly healthy seniors. If all of Medicare becomes privatized, seniors will either face denials of service or pay for service out-of-pocket. This is different from what most of us planned for in retirement. This is not how Medicare was set up to provide services. It will take a significant effort on the part of organizations like yours to stop this program. You will face major corporations with deep pockets, politicians indoctrinated in the advantages of private companies providing better care than the government, and a public unaware of what is happening. CMS argues that private companies will provide better care more economically than the government. The facts do not bear this out.
| Yes | Yes | Yes | My role is to draw attention to the developing problem. I am not a politician and need help to understand the process of using local or national media. My submission of an article to our local paper was denied publication. AARP is primarily funded by United Healthcare which stands to profit from ACO REACH, so they cannot speak honestly. Most politicians remain unaware of the looming problem and are content to entertain lobbyists and collect donations. Most media outlets seem reluctant to publicize such a controversial confrontation.
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| November 16, 2022 | Julia | 32034 | juleshard23@gmail.com | In 2013 my elderly father, living in his house was experiencing progressive worsening symptoms of Dementia. My younger son was living with him at the time and trying to help as best he could. Son alerted me that my father was on a decline, leaving stove on, doors unlocked, etc. There were neighbors/former co-workers, a girlfriend going out to eat, bank, etc. with him. My son questioned the relationship with these folks and warned me about this. I contacted his doctors' and they both wrote notes to me stating my father may need assistance, as his health was declining and my presence would be helpful if I could be stationed nearer to him. The military was kind enough to issue me orders, shortening my tour, and allowing me to transfer to a unit very close to his home.
| After several months in my father's home, cleaning, cooking, doing everything I could to help him while focusing on my full time military career, the situation became stressful. My father insisted he needed no one's help, and that he was fine. He also made the same statements after we visited his primary care doctor, and his attorney. He suddenly became resentful, hostile, and told me and spouse to move out, ASAP. I had some medical issues at the time, and had no place to go with my household goods in storage. My spouse and I ended up in an Extended Stay, in a nearby town. Then, a couple of months later my son was locked out of the house and had access a window upstairs to gather his belongings and leave as well.
| As we left his house on less than favorable terms, and I told my father I would only return if there was some emergency and would soon retire to another state. These friends, neighbors, former Federal Co-workers and his girlfriend kept coming to my father's home. They were all given keys to everything and my father seemed to trust all these people, and was always showing them into the house and showing them around. He was missing my mother, who died in 2010 and liked to show off her fine silver, china, and things she had inherited from back 3 generations in her family. She still had jewelry, antique mahogany furniture, and everything she had kept from her families treasured items. There was inherited money in the bank, and my father had a cache of weapons in the house and garage for safety reasons.
I sent a few cards, tried to call him over the years, and no answer. In early 2000, there was a call from a longtime friend of the family (a nurse) who said she had received disturbing late night calls from my father recently. She wanted to know if I was aware of his situation, and I did not being that I had not heard from him since we left. The family friend stated that when COVID hit, she found him alone, dirty, and that almost everything in his house, packed garage was gone! I wanted to talk to him and see him, but knew this was not the right time to travel as the virus was keeping everyone at home. After 4 months, I got another call from an older son who told me the rest of his garage was being emptied of all of his machinery, tools, tanks, massive saws, milling machine, drill presses, years of mechanical and technical books he saved. Weapons were also taken, and values stashed in the garage.
| Once I was able to travel to Virginia in early May of 2020, I was able to talk to my father, who told me, "You stole money from my banking/savings account". I asked him for details, he wasn't sure, except to say that the bank was presented with a note and other documents by someone who said they were me and my husband, and my mother's only next of kin, and withdrew all the money in the account. After hearing this I called the bank fraud line and reported my concerns, then visited the bank branch where this happened, and tried to report identity theft, and Elderly Financial Fraud. I also reported everything to local police, state police, Dept of State for my mother's missing passport, Social Services, and began making a list of all that was gone from his home as best as I could remember. Not one agency, seemed interested in helping me because I wasn't the victim! I was only his daughter, so this was hearsay, and not really considered a valid claim. After visiting his attorney's office, I found out that he knew what had happened, but also did not seem to care about the Elder Fraud and Abuse, not reporting any of this to the authorities! At one point in a follow up phone call to the attorney, he stated he was "working on it". I never received followup, nor any help from anyone in the system. This seems as if, at least in the State of Virginia, that if the victim doesn't report these crimes, then it never happened. Please understand that I do not wish revenge for the perpetrators, only justice be served on these folks who committed horrible acts of crime towards my vulnerable, elderly father. The things taken, nearly everything were family heirlooms, precious things that were to be passed down to our small, existing family, me and my sons!
| Yes | Yes | Yes | If persons like these so called, friends, neighbors, a girlfriend, even Federally retired co-workers, are not stopped, they will continue to target the elderly and I believe they will continue to profit and not be held accountable until they meet their judgement day when they die. Social Services was not even aware of an online course that can be taken in the event of elderly crimes, I took the training, then asked the agency if they had taken the Online Reporting Criteria course for Elderly Fraud & Abuse, and the Supervisor at this Social Services said no!
Laws must be strengthened to protect, report, and hold anyone accountable of known Elder Fraud, by family, especially next of kin!
Reporting: If everyone is held accountable, Attorneys (especially Elder Attorneys), Health Care workers, Bystanders who suspect a crime, business vendors, banks and their officials, we might get this type of criminal activity under control one day!
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| March 4, 2023 | wendy | 19060 | 267-218-0951 | After the sudden death of my father in March 2018, my mother returned from Pennsylvania back to her primary residence in Florida. My parents also owned property in Ocean City NJ, where they resided during the summer months. Upon returning to Florida my mother redid her will and estate, as well as adding both myself and sister to both her bank accounts. Both my sister and I reside in Pennsylvania. During early 2020, she was experiencing depression and anxiety but insisted she was OK and wanted to remain in Florida. We spoke every day. She was seeing doctors in Florida and working on different medications. Shortly after the covid 19 pandemic occured my mother called me and said she was in Ocean City NJ. She told me that my sister and brother in law went down unexpectedly as a surprise to bring her up to her NJ home. A few months later she was upset that her electric bill was over 500 dollars and she told me she was calling the electric company. As my sister and her family were at the shore those months I told her that was probably the reason. She didn't want to say anything. My mother was scheduled to see a neurologist in late August. Earlier in August, my mother told me that my sister made a room for her at her house. She believed this was to make it easier for my sister to take her to the upcoming doctor appointment. I went over to see her and her room. I thought it was good for her to be around people rather than alone in Florida or New Jersey. It was the middle of covid and the only person wearing a mask was my mother in her room. When my nephew arrived he did not have a mask. Neither did my niece. My mother told me that she just stayed in her room and always wore her mask. We were both a little concerned but again she didn't want to say anything. Due to covid I was told that I could not attend the appointment only one person was allowed to go. She called me after and said the neurologist wanted some testing done, which was scheduled for late August. Although I asked my sister to please keep me informed, she did not. Most of my information was given to me by my mom. It was difficult visiting her with covid so we mostly talked on the phone all the time. After she had the testing the neurologists provided a 19 page written report, which they also went over in depth with my sister present. My mother told my sister to email me a copy of the report. She called me after the appointment and was a little upset because she couldn't drive anymore. Her diagnosis was dimentia. The report noted multiple things, one being at risk for both benevolent exploitation as well as by others. Her cognitive abilities were very impaired and she needed help in decision making. Several suggestions were made, including that she was not to be alone. It was suggested that a home care person be hired. I was told that they had it covered. However, it was evident that every time I spoke to her she was alone. My mom did not want me to say anything. Shortly after, my mom called me and said she just got back from the hospital. She fell down the steps and broke her ankle, she had to call 911 as again no one was there. She now had to have physical therapy. Then in November of 2020 she called me from the shore and said that my sister had covid so my niece took her to the shore. It was just a matter of time. I have no idea what they were doing with her at this point. I think they took her to a testing site and she was now positive also as well as my sisters husband and daughter. In December, my mother called me upset that her eyes itched and she didn't have an eye doctor in PA. Again, no one was there. I told her I would call her back and called my eye doctor's office who scheduled a tele appointment for later that day. She called me after the appointment and thanked me she really liked the doctor and he said it was common for covid to spread to the eyes. A couple days later I asked her how the drops were working and she said she didn't have them yet. I couldn't beleive it. No one was there. I told her I would go get them and leave on the step but she seemed afraid and told me no she thought someone was picking them up that day. She never wanted me to say anything. I now know why. In March 2021, she told me she was going to a new doctor in Springfield because she didn't have a family doctor here in PA. She called me after the doctor and told me her blood work was good and the doctor also gave her xanax. Knowing that medication was not recommended and specifically mentioned in the 19 page report of August 2020, I was starting to get concerned. We had plans in May if covid was less restrictive to spend some time at the shore together for my birthday. Prior to my birthday my mom asked if we could reschedule the shore but wanted me to come over on my birthday. I went to see her on May 14, 2021 that afternoon. We sat outside talking and I noticed at times she had a blank stare. Something seemed wrong. My sister came home and they were in a rush to go to the shore. My mom said things were not going well and she had 2 doctors appointment the following Monday and Tuesday. I asked her if I could take her and she said she would really like that. I hugged her and left. This was a Friday. I called her Sunday at about 10 PM, hoping it wasn't too late. She said no she was still up. Something didn't seem right and I wanted to make sure she was OK. When I asked her if I could take her to the doctor I could hear my neice in the background saying "tell her you have a ride". She told me I could take her to the next one.
Later that week she called and mentioned that my sister and brother in law were talking about buying her Florida house so she could help me. I didn't need any help and I told her I did not think it was a good idea right now. After being hung up on several times all of a sudden my calls went straight to her voicemail without ringing. My sister had her at the shore. This continued for several days and then I learned that my number was blocked from her phone. Being unable to contact her I became pretty upset. My sister then used the police to keep me from seeing her at her home and I was told that I would have to go through the court system because my sister said something to them about on going problems. Although I told the officier I was being kept from my mother who had dementia by my sister. Unsure what to do, several attorneys said that it was imperitive to contact COSA, the local agency in my area. I was a little hesitant because I didn't want to hurt my mom. I thought to myself no one can keep a person from their mom this is crazy. Then I received a notice in the mail that a PFA was denied. I couldn't believe it. Unsure of what was going on I thought I better let her attorney know in an effort to protect her estate from anything happening so I emailed the attorney informing him of her condition and mention of selling her house in which I was a 50% beneficiary. He replied asking me the names and then told me he couldn't speak to me as I was not his client. Then my phone which was on a family plan with my mom was cancelled. They had access to my phone, my mother's phone, her emails, her properties which locks were changed, and continued to isolate my mother from all communication with me. I was able to get my number back from AT T on June 18, 2021 at which time I decided to stop at both of my mothers banks to see if any changes were made. One bank told me I didn't exist and could not tell me anything else. The second bank told me that all my access was changed and I was not even authorized to make a balance inquiry, but was still on the account. He further said that if he were me he would run to a lawyer. I could not believe this was happening. At this point I did contact COSA, which was supposed to be confidential. I was told an investigation including bank accounts would be done. Then all of a sudden police were storming up my house because a call was made saying I was going to commit suicide. I told them what was going on and again was ignored. This was the first false police report. The day the investigator went to the home, the police again were called with lies about texting threats of killing myself to my mother. No such texts exist. All the while being told this is a civil matter. My friend thought I better go to the District Attorney's office so he drove me up there. The woman there was a disgrace to say the least. It was to much effort for her to write anything down let alone listen to what was happening. It was very deeming and unfriendly and this was supposed to be the person in charge of the so called "elder exploitation unit". What a sad experience. I received multiple nasty messages from my mothers phone as if it was her now accusing me of multiple criminal things and threats to file charges. I continued to receive threats from a relative in Wisconsin, which my lawyer was able to find out who the number belonged to. I noticed on facebook that every family relative disappeared, cousins I haven't talked to in years. Although, I went to the police about the false reports no one could do anything about it. What is scary is that they could actually use my sick mother to say or do anything. After following up with COSA I became very uncomfortable and hired an attorney. Til this day, my phone receives non stop messages from unknow numbers, email texts with explicite content, and all types of things. My mom was my best friend and only family I had left. When I texted my sister asking why her bank accounts were changed, they actually had her call me then took the phone and started screaming oh my god your stealing moms money. I knew now that this was real and my mother was being lied to. The worst part is nobody could help her or me. Then unsure where they had her I called to have a wellness check done. The police officier told me she was OK but never even saw her. Can you imagine. This is a person's loved one and my mother was not there she was in Florida with my sister. Knowing something didn't seem right the next day I called both New Jersey and Florida and Florida was able to confirm that she was at the Florida residence with my sisters family. That week in Florida, my sister took her to the attorney. She was actually the one who drove her there flew her there having full knowledge of the 19 page neurology report and being present at all doctors appointments knowing my mother's disease progressed, while isolating her from her other daughter, and provided a note with one sentence from a different doctor and changed everything on my mother's estate to herself and added her husband to my mothers financial power of attorney. She was now 100% beneficiary of my mothers home in Florida. She didn't stop there though. My father's pension beneficiaries were changed to her children and I was removed from my mom's 401k making my sister 100% of excess of 40,000 dollars. These changes all were made via email communications from my mother's email, which my sister had control of. It did not stop after Florida. I still am not sure about my parent's property in Ocean City. Sadly, as of today and my many attempts for justice my mother still resides with the very abusers who did this. I was attacked for contacting COSA, which I thought was confidential and treated like a criminal throughout the entire court proceeding. Every effort taken failed. No one did anything to help my mom or myself. In fact, doctors wrote letters saying that my mother said I was stealing her money. How pathetic is that. Of course, they will all be reported. Dispite the fact that a second doctor confirmed everything from the original August 2020 report my mother continues to be a victim and remains residing with the very people who did this. My mom continues to be isolated from her daughter knowing the damage caused by such isolation. She continues to be told lies about me so she will say "she doesn't want to see me" despite her progressive dimentia. So when I hear about how all this progress has been made and new task forces focusing on exploiting an elder, it makes me sick. I was forced to testify that I called COSA, which again is CONFIDENTIAL. Their own doctor who wrote a paragraph in his report of what my sister said defaming me with lies and then added his own opinion stating I sounded drunk on a phone message she played for him. This was during an evaluation in which this same doctor said my mom was fine but yet she didn't pass a single test. This is the very agency who is supposed to help my mom. My mother continues to be isolated from me. May of this year will now be 2 years. Evil does not describe what has happened. This is beyond sick and unthinkable. No amount of money can ever give me the time lost with my mother.
| EVERYTHING
| Be careful trust no one
| How it is that a person can be prevented from seeing a parent, and for no reason at all be denied any information regarding their parent's health is unconstitutional. I would like to know how that can happen. A child should not have to pay attorney's to see their parent who they had a healthy loving relationship with. The second a person can not reach their parent something should be done immediately by law enforcement. I am sorry to say that Pennsylvania has failed my mother and myself and I live with emptiness and sadness and will probably never see my mom again. I want everyone to know what has happened to me and my mom and how every effort I took failed. I want answers myself as to how this can happen. I am not sure what my hopes are other than people who do this belong in jail. Not in civil court. There has to be a remedy of prison. I will continue to fight for my mother's justice. I want people to know the truth. Not a single agency helped. NOT ONE!!!!!! Please tell me who I can contact for help. Can congress help? Who? I would like to know.
| Yes | Yes | Yes | Help me tell my story
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| May 6, 2025 | Donna | 28401 | dgunter3158@gmail.com | My 87 year old uncle was scammed. He lives alone and does have some health issues. I am his closest living relative and his POA.
| My uncle was scammed. He really was caught up in the scam and lost a lot of money. My issue is with the financial institution that allowed him to withdraw large amounts of money out of our joint account. I was added to his bank accounts to be able to pay his bills, etc once he was unable to do so. The financial institution kept allowing him to withdraw cash knowing he was being scammed. They never once attempted to contact me to alert me of their suspicion of fraud/scam. It was only after he came in for the 4th time to clean out his account did they call me. I feel the bank failed to protect my uncle. This bank knows my uncle as it is his branch.
| Be diligent and be aware. Scammers are so controlling. It's easy for anyone especially the elderly to get caught up. Financial Institutions need to be held accountable for not protecting their customers when they suspect fraud/scam.
| That financial institutions are made to alert joint account holders when large amounts of money are being requested. I can't stop my uncle from getting his money. But as a joint account holder, I could've help save him from almost total loss.
| Yes | Yes | Yes | I would love to share our story. The financial institution is steadfast that they followed their policy. My issue is that is policy more important than helping your fellow human. If they would've reached out to me, I could have saved my uncle. There is much more to this story. This is only a short description.
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| December 21, 2023 | Myrna Sumiran Lavoie | 94565 | myrna.lav1122@gmail.com | My story is grand theft, financial abuse from a 52 year old man who was 46 when he tricked me. The full story is at Q2, it's also at Gofundme titled "Scammed Elderly" as I'm trying to raise funds to hire lawyers to take him to court and achieve justice and/or he pays what he owes which is $105,000.
| Hi, I'm Myrna Sumiran Lavoie of Pittsburg, California, I'm 82 years old. A very warm and heartfelt greetings to all. I'm asking for help because I was scammed badly by a 52 year old man named Kulwinder Shergill Singh (or KSS).
I wrote my Congressman John Garamendi & Josh Harder of Stockton in February 2023, also wrote CA Senator Alex Padilla and Governor Gavin Newsome's office. Their reps said it's out of their jurisdiction. I wrote pres. Biden and VP Harris, White House staff wrote back, stated my case has been forwarded to the proper Fed agency but I haven't received any call or email up to now. I wrote to all news outlet, only one replied on Feb. 2023 yet never contacted me again.
I filed an FTC complaint in April, also wrote CA. Attorney General Rob Bonta but they all can't help me. I called the FBI, they recommended CA. state bar association. I called them, the rep said it will cost over $75,000, same with other lawyers. I called the Elderly Fraud Hotline, they can't help, suggested the Department Of Justice. I filed a fraud/grand theft report to the DOJ on Apr. 29, 2023 and a 3949-A form (tax violation) with the IRS in mid May, no reply up to now. I hope someone can help me make KSS face justice, there's no other entities I can turn to.
Below is the story.
Back in June 2017, while my car was being serviced at KSS car shop in Stockton (he was 46 then), I mentioned to him my plan to sell my house in Stockton for $140,000. I had a breast cancer in late 2016, underwent double mastectomy and radiation therapy. Was finally in remission by June 2017, needed to sell the house which my youngest son bought in 2012 per my request to keep me active. But I can no longer maintain it due to poor health.
I took my old car to KSS's shop whenever it needed oil change and inflating tires, he and his fiance were nice & friendly. He always brought me cold water to drink, spent time to talk which I rarely get from my two sons who are always busy at work.
He inspected my property in July 2017 and offered $125,000 which I accepted. I agreed to his request not to hire a realty agent and title company, it saves 6% commission charge by the 2 party's realty brokers plus the title company's fees. This equates to around $15,000 which allowed the house to be lowered from $140,00 to $125,000. I agreed to his request as he's really kind & nice. He promised to pay with a Bank Of America cashier's check from a joint account of him and his mom on or before Aug. 2017. He told me they have over $100,000 which came from sold properties in India.
However, before KSS scheduled date to pay his initial downpayment, he gave me a Purchase Agreement which he asked me to have my son sign being the owner of the property. This Purchase Agreement states that my son is selling his house to KSS for $50,000 only. The document was prepared by KSS's Notary whom he borrowed $20,000 from for the downpayment. He said he needs a $50,000 Purchase Agreement so he can borrow $50,000 from an Indian friend who has a Financial Service Co. that also lends money. He told me he needs this extra cash as the joint bank account between him and his mom containing +$100,000 will be depleted in fully paying me. He said he shouldn't be low in cash being a car shop owner, always needing back up money for his business. I agreed to this Purchase Agreement to help him, also to get the transaction going. Thus, I coaxed my son to sign the Grant Deed and be notarized under KSS name as well as to sign the Purchase Agreement.
When KSS and I went to Bank of America in August 2017 using my car, he didn't let me go with him to the cashier's window, had me wait at the bank's lounge chair. When he returned, he said his mother withdrew $100,000 from their joint account. We then went to his car shop where I had to use the bathroom as there's none in the bank, Ieaving my papers in my big brown envelope inside my car. I couldn't find the Grant Deed in my brown envelope 2-3 days later. I think he took it while I was in the bathroom. When I went to the County Recorder's office, I was told my house was already recorded in his name.
When I went to him to ask about this transfer, he had a sudden change of personality. He was no longer nice, demanded I leave and never see him again. But I went again to his shop a few days later, he was so loud and nasty. He threatened something real bad will happen to me or any of my offsprings if I don't stop going to his shop, pursuing this matter. He sold my house a year later (August 2018) for $140,000 after renting it out for 1 year. My biggest mistake was coaxing my son to sign the Grant Deed and $50,000 Purchase Agreement that KSS made thru his Notary, telling my son that KSS is a trustworthy, kind, nice man. He promised to pay the $125,000 that we both agreed to, there's no way my son and I will sell the house for only $50,000 since my son spent over $60,000 in buying and fixing that house in 2012. Also, houses of that size in Stockton were selling over $140,000 in 2017.
Yet in spite of the $50,000 Purchase Agreement, KSS only paid $20,000 that was borrowed from his Notary. Hence, everything he told me was a lie, to convince me to sell the house to him. KSS methodically tricked me step by step by offering things that seemed advantageous to us both when it only benefitted him. He kept giving proposals which I agreed to being so trustful of him, not realizing he's already defrauding me. First, by offering to buy the house for $125,000 which was ok, having proposed a way to save $15,000 via not using a realtor and title company. Then he said he and his mother has a joint bank account containing over $100,000 from sold properties in India which I believed due to him having a car shop.
Then he convinced me to a $50,000 Purchase Agreement so that he won't be short of money for his shop. I was concerned of his business and thus, agreed to his requests. It's only later on that I realized he will have a legal document to show ($50,000 Purchase Agreement) in case he reneges on our $125,000 agreement. My biggest mistake was being so trusting & naive. But that's how we elderlies are as seen by our numerous scam stories not only here at Go Fund Me but anywhere in USA.
Overall, his promise to pay the remaining balance ($105,000) was a big lie just like the many other things he said. He methodically set me up badly step by step even if he knew I recently had breast cancer. He profited huge by selling my house in August 2018 for $140,000, also rented it out for 1 year before selling it.
He caused me severe emotional stress since mid 2017 after recovering from breast cancer, I wasted the last 5 years doing attorney-like, legal papers so as to take him to court. I don't have $75,000 for attorney fees and thus, I had to do the papers myself when I'm not even a lawyer. I have 3 big boxes of all these papers as seen at my photo. I've been to the doctor many times starting mid 2017 due to high BP, high blood sugar, lack of sleep/rest, frequent nausea, vomiting, dizziness, light headedness, etc. All due to the stress KSS caused me, was even hospitalized. I have records of all visits to the MD and hospital since mid 2017.
I also feared for my life and my sons if I visit KSS again. But a 76 year old lady friend encouraged me to pursue justice. Hence, we went to his abode in 2021. He got mad at me for still pursuing him; told us he no longer has the money ($140,000), used them to pay his debts to people he defrauded before me. Even the previous D.A. was after him, he told me in front of my 76 year old friend to stop the D.A. from harassing him. I reported him to Stockton police in 2017 who turned it to the D.A.
When I went to his shop in early 2021, it was already closed. I stopped pursuing him in 2018 after his threats, it's only now that I have the courage to pursue again. I told this to his 17 year old son Lakhbir Shergill (nicknamed Bir, he's 23 now) in 2017, asked him to help me. He said he can't interfere with his dad's affairs. I went to KSS brother's shop called Gill's Tires & Auto Repair also in Stockton, he also said he can't interfere with KSS affair.
I contacted several news outlets hoping some or one features this story so that it doesn't happen to others especially elderlies. I also wrote Bay Area representatives hoping someone takes interest and author a bill requiring County recorder employees to contact the previous owner or family members first to verify the transfer of a property before recording it under the new owner (i.e. the grant deed named to) so as to prevent fraud, theft.
Any help, no matter how small, is greatly appreciated. The money will be used to hire lawyers to finally bring KSS to justice as the statute of limitation for elder scam or abuse is 10 years plus any other charges the attorneys can come up with. Will be great to hire high profile lawyers like Gloria Allred, et al who fights scam-abuse on women. I will return all the money donated or donate them to all the other scammed elderlies at Gofundme once KSS finally pays the $105K he owes or the law trace where he wired the money (e.g. an associate) from selling my house.
If Bir happens to read this, I hope he's a good adult now and do the right thing via paying what his dad owe. KSS always said in 2016-17 he pays for Lakbir's upbringing and eventual college attendance. Bir also told me this on why he can't interfere with his dad's affairs being dependent on him.
KSS needs to be brought to justice or put in jail (it's 4-5 years for financial elder abuse), he's getting brazen, his crimes are increasing. I googled him, he has many, was even booked this Sept. for assault with a deadly weapon. I failed to google him in 2017, some or many of us elderlies are tech unsavvy but I'm trying to improve. It won't be long when KSS scams and/or physically hurt another person, he needs to spend time in prison to make him change.
Misdemeanors are only given 6 months max, or he simply may have been booked and spend a few days in jail, won't change him. If I take him to court with your help, he will be compelled to pay what he owes or be jailed 4-5 years. Bir, his brother who's also a car shop owner, and others can help him, lend him money then he pays them later being his family.
Please help me bring KSS to justice, it will also be victory for folks he victimized before & after me. We immigrants vowed not to do harm upon migration here in USA, be an asset or contribute to it, not victimizing others. Yet he keeps getting away with his rotten, evil deeds. Won't be long when KSS has a new heinous case online, he needs to be stopped instead of always thinking he's untouchable, can beat/escape the law or the law doesn't apply to him or the law will never catch up to him, knowing how to evade it.
He's also known as Lucky (his nickname) to his family and community. His old shop in Stockton was called Lucky's Tireshop & Auto Repair. His luck of always successfully victimizing others, evading justice, knowing his way around US laws, making a mockery of them or getting away with his foul deeds need to end. Thanks and God bless you all.
| Be very careful of person(s) who are so nice to you when it comes to properties and/or money matters. Chances are, they're after what you have. Don't easily trust anyone, always use a lawyer or a 3rd party who handles financial matters so that you won't get tricked, scammed, deceived like me.
| Kulwinder face justice and/or he pays the $105,000 he owes. I need media exposure for it to happen.
| Yes | Yes | Yes | Please help me, I need media exposure to finally achieve justice. I'm still within 10 years statute for elder abuse. Thanks & Happy Holidays.
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| November 7, 2024 | Hunter | 88061 | caridaddecobre@yahoo.com | Three days before Christmas of 2023, I signed for a certified legal letter with a threat to evict me unless I complied with certain conditions dictated by my son-in-law and daughter. They own this run-down casita that I have called home since 2021. I immediately replied to the threat by citing legal precedent and sending their attorney a copy of the checks that I contributed toward the purchase of this property. I assured their lawyer that I would contest any formal eviction myself in a court of law. Soon this esquire informed me that he no longer represented my family. At the time, I was 70 years old with no husband or income other than social security.
It should be noted that my only child was born out of conflict, not love. I fornicated with a cruel and creative man because I was homeless; I could not abort. The father of my child was pathological with money–a trait he passed on to his only child and so much more insidious than the beautiful blue eyes she inherited from him. My daughter insisted that if I did not vacate this casita voluntarily, that no landlord would ever rent to me again. Her attempt to play into my biggest fear–homelessness–was also a form of abuse perpetrated with malicious intent in my humble opinion.
| During the pandemic, I contributed a large portion of my savings toward the purchase of this historic property in Silver City. An agreement was made in good faith–I would reside in the smallest dwelling place. However, when I finally set foot into that tiny space, I realized it would feel as if I were confined to a prison cell. I opted to spend the final chapter of my life in a three-room casita on this property built in 1877. Initially this was acceptable, but greed surfaced. A source of contention was my survival after my second heart surgery in 2021. My daughter asked me what I believe to have been an abusive question: “What if you live another 20 years?” I assured her that I didn’t have the money or desire to live into extreme old age. Unsatisfied, she persisted: “But what if you do?”
| Despite having no criminal history, it was decided that I can no longer have contact with my only grandchild. I believe this is a form of punishment for not complying with their demands. The structures on this land are high maintenance, in constant need of repair. The resident handyman yelled, cursed and raised his hand at me in a threatening gesture. My family refused to evict or run a criminal background check on him. Eventually this angry man yelled at an 80-year-old Air B and B cleaner working on this property. Appalled and concerned for our safety, I then decided to file a complaint against Handy-Andy with the local police. Was my son-in-law's refusal to evict/background check this verbally abusive worker elder abuse? You decide.
| My hope for the future is to live out the rest of my life without ever being homeless again.
| No | Yes | No | |
| June 22, 2023 | Jane | 28258 | jhedwards804@gmail.com | I am a 75 year-old Army vetern, retired w/SCD. I am physically compromised by age, a mental weakness that allows me to trust those that are kind to me, and the loss of a couple of digits. Michael George and Traci Hynes are middle-aged, healthy people with children who, along with Traci's parents are living in two homes that are on his 14-acre hemp farm that adjoins my property.
| At the time of my problems with my neighbors, Michael G. and Traci Hynes, I was living alone on my 4.38 acre property, attempting to repair and restore two homes in order to sell. I was overwhelmed by the enormity of my tasks, and compromesed by my diminished physical ability for construction labor, nd hampered by my inability to hire local workers to help me due to the COCID-19 epidemic. Michael convinced me to lend him a $90,000.00 business/personal loan for the purpose of freeing him of his $96,000.00 credit debt. He promised me that, once he payed off his debt, he would no longer have to work odd jobs in order to pay the monthly interest of these debts. Then he could spend more of his time helping me repair and restore my property. After I gave him the money, Michael tricked me into signing a "loan agreement" that enabled him and his wife to keep the $90,000.00 business/personal loan, allowing them to repaying the loan over 15 years, and paying me back with no intrest.
| Dispite the state and federsl laws forbiding, or, at least, discouraging financial exploitation of the elderly, I have been unsucessful over the past two years in finding legal help, or a lawyer who is willing to help me. The Sheriff's Department (who has juristiction over Gloucester, NC) is that I signed a contract, and no crime has been committed that justifies their investigation. The Buncombe County magistrate's position is that she "wouldn't give money to my own children," and that I "am free to enter into a bad deal." The Carteret and Craven County District Attorny's position is that "everyone is free to embark on a bad deal," and that I need to get a lawyer. The Department of Social Services's position is that I "need a lawyer." The State Attorney's Elder Abuse division's position is that I need a lawyer.
I am reciving an army pension and SSI payments. I am not indigent, but, because I am $90,000.00 short, and have a sick spouse I support, and a home for which I pay and average of $3000.00 a month in utilities every month, I can not afford to hire a lawyer. I am not the only elderly person - suseptible to trusting perceived friends - who is juggling these sorts of expenses. How is anyone surprised that the increase in elder financial abuse is "on the rise?"
| I hope that , in the future, all the entities that are "committed to abolishing elder financial abuse and holding their abusers accountable" actually start doing things to reach their state goal.
| Yes | Yes | Yes | If anything positive comes from the time and effort I have spent filling out this form, I will probably keel over with a massive stroke.
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| December 3, 2022 | Jim | 61475 | jimap@mtcnow.net | My mother was 83 years old and was diagnosed with moderate to severe Alzheimer and dementia. My brother Greg and his wife Debbie kept this diagnosis from the rest of the family. Then Greg and Debbie started taking mom to her attorney (changed POA to himself) had her resign a new will, changed beneficiaries on bank accounts, revoked the trust, terminated my oral farm contract. They isolated mom from family. They would write checks for cash that Debbie wrote out and mom signed. As her acting POA Greg did not have moms house rebuilt (totalled from straight line winds) and settled with insurance for 40,0000 . less than what was due to mom. That house was to be inherited b another brother who has since passed away. The bank notified me that things did not seem right. I took mom to her attorney and mom wanted everything put back in original form according to her estate plan. When Greg and Debbie found out about the accounts being reinstated they took mom to her a At one point Debbbie handed a not to mom at the bank telling the teller to take myself and a brother off of accounts. At one point Greg as moms acting POA closed out some bank accounts and moved them out of state so we have no access to records. These points are the main problems.
| Elder abuse, undue influence and financial exploitation is rampant and usually committed by family members. The articles that you can read about it states it is hard to prove in court giving the perpetrators confidence that they can get away with the abuse.
| Do not trust that your family members will do the right thing. Be prepared. Document everything. Diligently watch what is going on. Try to keep communication open. We never thought we would be in this court nightmare.
| Laws need to be passed. An elderly person (anyone over the age of 60) that suddenly wants to change most of their estate plan needs to go through the court system to assess the physical and mental condition of the elder. It seems to be so easy for an unscrupulous family member to convince an elder with a diagnosed condition to sign documents that they have no idea what they have signed and the consequences of those changes. It seems extremely difficult to get through the court system in a timely manner to get any results to reversing all the changes made to the estate plan. We have been in court for 6 years. It takes a toll on our health and we see the anxiety that it has caused in our grown children.
| Yes | Yes | Yes | There seems to be no respect for an elderly person's estate plan. The attorneys are part of the problem with stalling for court dates. There needs to be higher held consequences for the abusers and the attorneys that are letting this abuse happen.
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| November 29, 2022 | Jim | 21220 | anders@kennedykrieger.org | From: Anders, James
Sent: Sunday, November 27, 2022 2:16 PM
To: Anders, James
Subject: VonUlrich
1514 Burke Road Baltimore Maryland 21220 – Freeze Accounts of Andrew von Ulrich – Elder Financial Exploitation investigation
History and facts – last 10 years
After my mother died – and prior to her death – for 45 years of marriage – I was essentially the only child living near them or actively in their day-to-day life. I participated in their day-to-day life (especially in navigating any legal or financial or transaction type events) – including all of their estate and financial planning. It became clear – that after years of marriage, separating assets into two buckets – his and hers from prior to marriage made no sense and they comingled all assets. Ninety percent of all assets came from my mother and her family (She had several houses – and money from her parents and an aunt). However, having been married for years and aging togethers as well as the legal documents and process required to prepared and maintain separate assets but to also provide for lifetime care for each other was no longer important. What was priority and important was care for life for both and sharing any remaining equally among 4 children – without exception even if the relationship was stressed or even estranged. I being a CPA (as was my mother), I participated in on all estate discussions and Wills and titling of assets. It was a focus and not a neglect of Regina von Ulrich or Andrew von Ulrich. They understood the importance of making sure their wishes were reflected in any documents. All Wills and all accounts were set up – and I participated in the strategy – to pass any remaining assets by way of beneficiary designation – and that remaining dollars were to be divided (I have copies) into 25% percent to each child. Much discussion happened around Christine in the early years as she was estranged from Andy and my mother. However, that became a topic that was decided about 15 or 20 years ago – the decision was --- all would be included. However, primary was care for life for both – and preservation of monies. All the trust and all the legal efforts to keep my mother’s money separate was stopped – although there are many Wills which had those conditions included. Andy and my mother committed to each other in front of me – and the attorneys (at that time) that they would never violate the joint wishes as a sole survivor. Melanie and I were always the two designated to insure this.
After my mother died and Andy was living alone – I visited regularly and had dinner – and watched (or pretended to watch and enjoy) his old movies. There were a few things that were important to him (he was a simple man of needs) – however, he knew that he needed to move to be supervised and monitored - for reasons related to age but also to a health diagnosis (to be highlighted below). I was – other than my mother – the only person who knew his health issue and prognosis (and also the cause of his death – however he was age 94 and had lived longer than the average from his cancer and the prognosis from the medical professionals).
We discussed Erickson Retirement Communities as an option – as I was a founding member of the Board of Directors for 21 years during the start-up and growth phase (built into a National Company) and we established the CCRC national community model of care and financing for seniors and a model designed for aging in place - (Continuing Care Retirement Community). I also Chaired the board of directors. However, he didn’t want to live in an old age home as he called it (BTW our communities are not old age homes and are very healthy active communities 😊). I also know things like - he had a face lift in his 60’s – again only my mother and I knew of this. He was a proud person and he wanted to live in the in-law cottage I had built for aging-in-place – which was only10 steps to my front door but independent living with safeguards and 24/7 monitoring.
Christine von Ulrich’s framing of the last 4 to 5 years as motivated by her goals – did not reflect the last 45 years or even the last 7 years. She doesn’t know the history and was not involved. She only started limited visits during the last 5 years. Although they had some prior contact over phone and internet – and an few visits by Andy to their houses to spend time – a few holidays. After a few visits – Christine talked to Andy about buying a house with (for) her and Andy to live – in Richmond VA. That was 4 or 5 years ago. Andy visited her – and came home upset – that Christine wanted him to move into a house they would purchase and she would take care of him. He wanted nothing to do with the idea – and said he wanted to stay in the in-law cottage. He was not happy at her persistence.
The Cottage is on a waterfront property with waterfront views – designed and built based on Erickson Retirement Community standards – note my son and I are both certified aging in place specialist. The Cottage was built for my mother in-law – and was designed as an aging in place cottage with a full bath and laundry and bedroom and kitchen – with all the safety features including an intercom system linked to my house. The front door is 10 steps from my front door and could be monitored 24/7. That is how I was able to find withing the day - Andy when he died. It has an emergency generator – internet – and all the features of senior living cottage – all on one level (no steps or obstacles). It has a separate HVAC system and a back-up generator for power. This was built special for aging in place seniors – and family. It is not a rental.
Andy was living in a mobile home park – double wide with my mother when she died. It was 30 minutes from my home and I was the only relative nearby. It cost him $600 a month to rent the pad (land space only) plus utilities and maintenance – he was spending more than $1,000 a month.
I was called regularly by park management if something happened. The park management called often – as Andy was often reported by neighbors for exposure or peeping Tom concerns. I would talk to Andy and he indicated he was outside peeing in the bushes. I of course told him he could not do this. Melanie living in Florida was called as well (She and I had always been the people to notify) – but all she could do was call me. Christine was not involved in his life at the time. When my mother-in-law died – Andy asked if he could move into the cottage – indicating he needed a place as he was getting older – it was also helpful to me – since we could monitor 24/7. I helped and my family helped – with selling the mobile home – and moving him. He liked the furniture my mother-in-law had – and he said he wanted the bed, living room furniture and kitchen table/chairs – including the recliner my mother-in-law had (ironically mentioned by Christine as Andy’s – of course she had no idea since she was not involved – it is soiled and trash at this point). Andy was also monitored by our neighbors – we are a waterfront community on a peninsula and at the very end of the peninsula. If he fell walking – neighbors would bring him home. They all knew him.
Christine didn’t know any of the history and definitely doesn’t know that the Cottage was built as am aging-in-place Cottage for our family (however it has a sign – and painting of a lighthouse – with the word’s – Granny’s Cottage 😊). Comments about rushing to get things removed so I can rent the apartment demonstrates her behavior of quickly removing all valuables and paperwork that contained anything that suggested she exploited Andy or any evidence of her actions. I told her no rush. We documented all phones calls – have all text and emails – and they are enlightening (especially during the first 2 weeks after he died). Melanie had no idea at that point of the changes made. And could not understand Christine’s insistence on need to quickly remove anything he had in his apartment. Of course, given the fiduciary responsibilities we all have to the estate – including Christine – simple elements such as an inventory of all assets in the apartment – jewelry, rare coin collects, silver and others – never happened. In one day – Christine came in an removed all valuables and the laptop with all his information and bank accounts – and did not remove anything that was trash. It should be noted, we have documentation of all calls – especially the 2 weeks immediately after his death – her many text asking to visit immediately to clean out his apartment – again we said no, there was no rush and we had time – plus we were going to sport events with out grandchildren. Her insistence and many texts suggest she wanted to get something out of the apartment quickly. Very odd – even Melanie said that there was no rush (until 2 weeks later when Christine told her that everything was now in only their names – changed during the last 3 years) Melanie then went “radio silent”.
Health Information and Cause of Death – known only to his doctor and myself – and the coroner.
Andy was in final stages of Malignant Neoplasm of Prostrate. Diagnosed about 15 years ago – but he is now at age 94 – and during the last 5 years – it was obvious he was slowing down significantly and impaired – all of his senses were significantly declining. Andy had a hard time hearing, his eyesight had deteriorated (he could not read without telescope lenses – and then only very slowly), he slept much of the day – and he was very slow understanding or knowing what he was being told. He spent a lot of money (which we paid on our account) playing with the TV and purchasing streaming services or movies or whatever – and even though he could not see TV well. He had an added speaker – that was so loud that we could hear from our house 😊. His walk was a shuffle and only very short shuffle steps. He cognitive understanding was slow – but he also never wanted anyone to know. When telling him something he often just said “yes” or “ok” – and I never knew if he really understood what I said.
I knew he had terminal cancer – he knew he had terminal cancer – and we all knew that when age 80 – maybe this slow cancer (not treated for age and protocol reasons 15 years ago) would give him 5 to 7 years – but he wanted to be somewhere – like this Cottage where we would monitor him 24/7. His wallet had 2 phone numbers for emergency contact – My wife and my phone number (no others). The night we found him – the police was at our home for 6 hours – and we needed his files and wallet – and the police had full access to everything as well. The last 5 to 7 years – Andy knew he was deteriorating – and the visits 3 or 4 times a year by Christine for a day would not provide her information into Andy (other than he was fragile and very slow) – but he condition and her not engaging much as he was maintaining his daily routine while she did whatever she did - allowed her to purchase a new laptop and work the entire day while Andy slept mostly or watched TV (most listened) while she sat on patio – going thru his files – and changing the banking verification numbers to her phone – or including her number as well. She had full access to all his passwords and accounts – and honestly, we all trusted her intentions – even though she was not a very social person with anyone while visiting – we knew that was just her.
The death certificate – which I have. I was managing his affairs and called the police and worked with the coroner. The police contacted his primary physician based on the records we provided that night. This was not important and Christine would not really know - she didn’t live with him nor did she have information or history. She did not know what caused his death and would never have guessed it was the cancer. She continued to ask during the 2 weeks we talked – do I know what caused his death. Without the coroner and his primary care physician – I didn’t discuss his medical history or condition with her.
Andy had all the signs of end of life and was in final stages of his malignant cancer and cause of death. In addition to not recognizing people (unless he saw them regularly and even then, it took him time to study to person), he was fatigued, maintained a routine and he had cognitive impairment. Cognitive impairment is a key factor in why older adults are targeted and why perpetrators succeed in victimizing them (most often relatives are the perpetrators – a very classic and documented statistic) . Even mild cognitive impairment (MCI) can significantly impact the capacity of older people to manage their finances and to judge whether something is a scam or a fraud. Mild cognitive impairment is an intermediate stage between the expected cognitive decline of normal aging and the more serious decline of dementia.13 Studies indicate that 22 percent of Americans over age 70 have MCI and about one third of Americans age 85 and over have Alzheimer’s disease. At age 90 to 94 – and being in the absolute final stages of cancer – Andy was a prime and easy target. However, I and Melanie knew the 45-year plan and goals of my mother and Andy (However, Melanie is now compromised – during the first 2 weeks after Andy’s death Melanie was clear on the wishes and plan as outlined for 45 years).
Will and Beneficiaries
As indicated earlier – every estate decision ever made was done with intent – and a significant amount of money was spent on legal fees – mostly to avoid this exact situation – but also to save on taxes. Their estate is not of a size that really needed much planning – however both my mother and Andy wanted to avoid conflict – how ironic this is just what they wanted to avoid. Christine during the first 2 weeks after Andy’s death said a few things that indicated she was struggling with the process and how to even tell Melanie and I of what has been changed during the last 3 years – and to somehow express it as she had no idea until now. Ironically, when she discussed it with the attorney helping with probate – she had information about the last 3 years? 🙂 I was the one that said she better get expert help with probate given the situation – and she called the local firm who helped make the changes to the Will 3 years ago – a Will of no value since all of the estate has been changed to reflect different beneficiaries – and to enrich Christine. I also recommended that his pension might have a life insurance element – and she called. From a fiduciary point of view – we want all assets accounted for. I actually think Christine and Melanie would benefit from a collective mutually friendly settlement of the estate – as we were doing for the first 2 weeks after Andy’s Death – prior to learning what Christine has been doing. However, the Will is not as important – and not material – since all assets have been removed from the estate (except maybe one bank account). It should be noted this strategy to designate as beneficiaries the heirs (all 4 children – 25% each) was planned long before Christine arrived back in Andy’s life – and was done with Andy and my mother and myself. What was changed during the last 3 years – as a fragile – late-stage cancer and 94-year-old man slept – were the beneficiaries. This now requires active forensic investigation by the Federal and State agencies – the banking regulators – the financial institutions – and honestly the involvement of national advocacy groups who are focused on a National Crisis as our population ages.
The executor has a fiduciary duty to an estate, and to its beneficiaries, when settling an estate plan. A fiduciary is someone in a position of trust and power, and the law recognizes this and so places an added burden on that person or institution to act with honesty, integrity, good faith, fairness and loyalty.
The fiduciary accepts legal responsibility for duties of care, loyalty, good faith, confidentiality, and more when serving the best interests of a beneficiary. Strict care must be taken to ensure that no conflict of interest arises to jeopardize those interests.
When administering an estate, an executor must give notice to creditors and pay the debts of the estate. The executor must also gather all assets together, prepare and file tax returns, distribute assets and close the estate. At all times, the executor must account for all assets of the estate.
Hiding and mismanaging assets, and a host of other deceptive, unfair, or negligent actions by an executor can result in litigation and could be illegal. These are crimes that federal and state regulations and various laws are designed to protest the estate and all potential beneficiaries.
We already know – fact – that assets have been removed from the estate and Andy’s legal residence – without inventory and without a valuation. Are they material in value? However, without following the process required legally in settling an estate – we don’t know for sure. I have inventory of coins – not sure it is a complete list of all the coins. However, the efforts to change beneficiaries during the last 3 years that removed two of the beneficiaries and increase the amount to 50% for both Christine and Melanie does have all the signs of Elderly Financial Abuse of:
1. A 94-year-old man in final stages of a Malignant cancer – frail and fragile – with signs of cognitive decline – significant hearing loss – and significant eyesight issues. During a 3-year period changed $500,000 in bank accounts to have Christine and Melanie be beneficiaries of entire amount – reversing 45 years of history and known intention of the deceased. There are prior estate legal documents with Register of Wills that help document – and even Melanie said she had a copy 3 weeks ago. Note: Christine told Melanie – on the phone with me – not to e-mail me what she had – email was not safe. 😊
There are list and examples of crimes published by Federal and State agencies – and this is a National Crisis.
• providing true but misleading information that influences the elder person's use or assignment of assets (Dessin, 2000);
• persuading an impaired elder person to change a will or bank accounts or insurance policy to alter who benefits from the will or policy (Central California Legal Services, 2001; Frolik, 2001; Smith, 1999);
Current Situation
During the last few weeks, Christine and Melanie have stopped all communication. Your office was investigating and just sent an email/letter. We all have a fiduciary responsibility – and as such – we have initiated and reported this situation to a number of Federal, State and Financial Authorities. One financial institution has already reached out several times. The United States Postal Service has opened a case – on Mail Fraud to investigate. They have requested that we keep all the records we have for use in their investigation. A report has been filed with the FBI – and we are waiting for triage -which might result in them referring to another Law Enforcement Agency, and The Maryland Department of Aging/Adult Protective Services also has been notified.
The urgency of removing the balance of contents is silly as they are of no value – Christine has already removed all valuables – and especially the computer laptop. I cannot release the files – but copies can be made. It is in the best interest of all concerned to be 100 transparent and to work together. We can mitigate cost of settling estate (even if we never talk again – we will be honoring the wishes of our parents and grandparents). My moral compass and North Star are to do the right thing for everyone – especially the fragile such as elderly and disabled. My goal is definitely not financial and 100% of my portion will go to legal cost or charity. For the Record: The reference to me being a millionaire and calling me a millionaire made me smile. I have only been called that once in my entire life – and that was by Christine via Melanie. Andy would never have said that or referred that – or make reference to a name “label” such as you are a millionaire. Insulting comment to me --- yes – but it does not reflect my values or my focus or who I am. That comment was from someone who does not know me – and was not said as a compliment. And if anything – Andy always bragged about my career at Kennedy Krieger Institute and my involvement at Erickson Retirement Communities. And the comment about Cristy – my deceased brother’s daughter – not being involved – that too was not Andy’s words. I would ask him about Christy – and he would say – I know Melanie talks to her and visits her – they are friends. And it was never a negative comment from Andy. Again, that was not Andy. Your investigation must have been an interview with Christine as I can hear her words in those quotes.
Proposal and next step
1. I have also been reviewing everything with two separate attorneys – and have considered engaging them – on a contingency basis.
2. The financial institutions need to continue their work – as this is serious for financial institutions – and much has been written and recent laws requiring them to take a more active role in stopping Elderly Financial Exploitation
3. The regulatory process – we have notified a few – and have a list of several others we are told to notify.
4. Advocacy groups – national – we have a list to include and have talked in the phone to 2 of them.
5. The Attorney General’s Office and state legislators – many of whom I know – need to understand how serious this national crisis has become – and if this case can be an example or help them understand the issue so as to involve the legislature – than that would be a win for me and the elderly. I am in a phase of life that impacting public policy and helping the most fragile is important to me and my last phase of career.
I know that these issues are important (I know the Elderly are fragile and at risk of abuse in so many ways. My entire life was focused on the Elderly and Disabled and most fragile of society. I know that those with disabilities and the elderly need advocates and people to look for ways to protect them from exploitation. Ironically – I never thought I would see it in my back yard. Fortunately, I personally have been blessed in life with many things – people and relationships are the most important. Blessings are not money or things – and doing the right thing ‘Always” should be our North Star.
I would hope that Christine and now Melanie would think about this – remember their duty as fiduciaries – and their legacy as well. I hope they find their North Star – and we are prepared to work with them – talk to them – and settle the estate – doing the right thing.
| The Federal and State laws and regulations combined with Banking regulation and procedures - actually help those committing Elder Financial Abuse - since most are relatives - and can gain access to accounts and passwords - online changes to accounts and beneficiaries are easy. Even if the Elderly person cannot hear well or see well - and if something is required to be signed - trust of a 94 year old is easy as well. Paperless Banking also helps cover up - since no mail is received to open and see changes.
| Don't trust - and always have 2 people involved - and financial institutions should not change bank accounts without notice to prior beneficiaries if the current owner is over a certain age. 94 years old is too old - statistically this person have cognitive issues.
| Better oversight and regulatory control and an investigation unit that is combined efforts of State, Federal and Banking regulation. A single point that those can get help and a coordinated federal investigation - forensic in nature. Today computer trails are evidence and banks have those files and history.
| Yes | Yes | Yes | We are currently in process of getting the interest of Federal and State and Banking. The amount taken is $500,000 and Andrew von Ulrich is not famous - so finding help is not easy. Ideas on who to call - all financial institutions have been notified and we hope assets frozen until an investigation is complete. Jim Anders
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| February 20, 2025 | Robert | 19335 | 484-252-9596 | Walked into the hospital with my most beautiful precious beloved mom with absolutely nothing anywhere near life-threatening wrong with her at all.
| My experience trying to get justice.
| Due to complete systematic failure and refusal to enforce laws in place to protect the public, our most precious beloved vulnerable elderly are being mass slaughtered at numbers over ten times higher than ever before in history in Pennsylvania hospitals completely unchecked and unrestrained.
| The doctor that killed my mom gets arrested and properly charged, and nobody again has to go through what I have, and am still suffering.
| Yes | Yes | Yes | Please contact me please !!!! Thank you.
https://youtu.be/-BnM8OPX4-I?feature=shared
Why is 20% rise in malaria in Africa from natural causes, or a select few cases of measles in Texas captures the solemn attention of local and world news, top scientists, the World Health Organization...ect, BUT ASTRONOMICALLY HYPER-ESCALATED, MORE THAN TEN TIMES HIGHER THAN EVER BEFORE NUMBERS OF OUR MOST PRECIOUS BELOVED ELDERLY, BEING WRONGFULLY KILLED IN PENNSYLVANIA MEDICAL FACILITIES, NOT ONLY GETS NO ATTENTION AT ALL, BUT CONVERSELY GETS WIDESPREAD COVER-UP, AND IS SYSTEMATICLY PERPETUATED AND ENCOURAGED BY ABSOLUTE REFUSAL OF AUTHORITIES TO ENFORCE THE LAWS IN PLACE TO PROTECT THE PUBLIC.
Nothing short of state sponsored, blatant, intentional mass serial manslaughter homicide of our most precious beloved vulnerable eldely.
Pennsylvania, the Elder Manslaughter State.
Letter to my Pastor:
Jack, There is just no way to win in this battle in this life in this so sickeningly deep dark evil world, thoroughly and completely run, controlled, and owned by the devil.
I cannot live with myself if I ever give-up, but the Chester County DA, the Medical Board, Law enforcement, all of our local, state and federal officials and represenatives, are the exact opposite of everything they are supposed to stand for. There is not a shred of integrity in any of them. By thier own written law they are all accesories after the fact in the gruesome horrific wrongful killing of my most beautiful, wonderful, sweet, kind, gentle, loving, caring, precious beloved mom. I have gone over and over the laws and statutes and everything there is to understand about the way it is supposed to be, and the ones running things are the very worst criminals of them all, far worse than probably just about any criminal who they lock up. Far far worse. Even after filing detailed reports of Chester County DA de Barrena-Sarobe's open violation of the, Crime Victims Rights Act of 2004 in person at the office of the US Attorney in Philadelphia, the highest legal official in Pennsylvania, he still hasn't ever even honored my legal right to confer with him, the government attorney on the private criminal complaint I filed against the doctor who very clearly 1) had a professional duty of care, 2) grossly breached that duty of care, which I have medical professional documented proof of, 3) that breach of duty caused injury, 4) the extent of that injury was death. The four factors of negligent homicide in a medical setting. In his knowledge of the crime, and use of his position to protect the killer, by the very law that he is supposed to represent, the DA is a criminal accesory after the fact, and one of the head perpetuators of the over 1000% unimaginably hyper-escalated rate of wrongful elder death currently slaughtering the hell out of our vulnerable elderly population en masse in Pennsylvania, including my precious beloved mom. The the overseer of the rampant disposal of our most vulnerable precious beloved elderly.
My whole family and extended family devastated. My poor old dad lost in life without his loving wife of 60yrs. No more big ladies trips to Atlantic City that relatives came from across the country for that my mom was the center of. No more Christmases with grandma. The One so special day that we all lived all through the year in anxious anticipation of, that made anything we had gone through all year to get there worth it.
My mom did not go to the hospital dying and they were unable to save her.
I walked in there with her with nothing anywhere near life-threatening wrong with her at all, and spent the next months all day every day by her side through the long torturous excruciating screaming in agony, heeeeelp meeeeee, aaaaaaa, it huuuuuurts, aaaaaa, heeeeeelp meeeee, aaaaaaaaaa, not from anything to do with anything she went in there for, or any exsisting condition. Solely from that terrible careless heartless souless wicked doctors blatant gross extreme negligence and severe malpractice. And not even by mere mistake. Performing an inappropriate procedure that even the US Agency for Hospital Research and Quality determined no reasonable doctor would have done, and then when that incision that never should have been made became infected, absolutely refusing against the adamant urging, begging and pleading of a professional home nurse and me to see her promptly, resulting in that infection localized to a small improper incision that never should have been made to begin with, traveling into her bloodstream and throughout her body and vital organs until she collapsed on the floor, and even then when she was rushed by ambulance back in to him, he severely botched the correctional procedure and quickly forced her back out to the rehab against my trying to do everything I could to keep her in as I could see she was in no condition, and even the rehab put her back in an ambulance and sent her back, before we finally got her the heck out of there to another hospital/doctor who upon sight of what Dr Hayes had done to her in Chester County Hospital, was visibly angry and couldn't hold back from belting out, what was that doctor doing, he had to of known this had no chance of working, rushing her into to the operating room to try to fix too late what he had done to her. Jack that's too much already and there's alot more. That doctor clearly killed my mom and I have multiple documented medical professional testimonies proving it.
In over a year doing everything that can possibly be done to at least try to get some kind of justice for what was done to my beautiful, wonderful, sweet, kind and gentle, precious beloved mom, all I find is pure evil and corruption to the depths of hell on earth. I couldn't even hear a word said in the AA meeting tonight. All I could do is think how/if I can go on living in this sickening wicked evil devils world. At what point do I just check myself out? I thank God for you Jack. You are a mighty presence for Him in this sick rotten evil world. I thank God most of all that i know Jesus, and that He has made His Truth so clear to me, that you certainly played a big role in, along with my very special grandma, my moms mom. I feel secure that He knows all of this, and of course far more than any mere human mind could ever contain, and I don't care what anyone says, in times when I'm thinking about it, even if I checked-out of this sickening evil rotten devils world by my own hand, He would be there with open arms, probably saying He's been expecting me, I endured quite well enough.
Bob Snodgrass 484-252-9596
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| May 11, 2026 | Andrew | 90068 | andls2000@yahoo.com | After surviving sepsis and spending weeks in the hospital, I spent two months in a care facility where I suffered neglect, malnutrition, bruises, bedsores: abuse that changed my life forever.
| Everything that happened to me re bedsore, bruises, malmutirtion and neglect is documented in my Elderly Diary, a digital diary I created on my laptop. It is now available on Amazon. I also created a website, to call attention to, raise awareness, of the epidemic of elder abuse.
| Elder abuse is a worldwide epidemic. The World Health Organization estimates that 320 million people will suffer from elder abuse by 2050.
| To fight elder abuse. To call attention to it, to raise awarenes. I have a GoFundMe campaign to raise money to do this. Check out my website at www.ElderlyDiary.com
| Yes | Yes | Yes | I am 80 years old. After more than 60 years as an independent active adult, my independence and mobility and quality of life has been substantially reduced. This is documented in the Elderly Diary. This has been/is extremely disturbing to me, adversely affecting my physical, emotional and psychological well-being.
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| March 31, 2026 | Jacqueline | 34292 | jackelin.sullivan@yahoo.com | My father, brother, and I were close. Our father was our hero, and we never imagined he would be taken advantage of. Not in a million years.
My father married Marie 6 months after his Alzheimer’s diagnosis. It appeared that their partnership was equal, but no one in my family or hers knew of his diagnosis. My father made his long-term directives 2 months after they married. He named me as his power of attorney, and health care advocate, and my brother was his alternate. Their finances were separate. They had separate bank accounts and retirement accounts. Nothing they owned was joint.
Marie’s pattern of control gradually intensified as my father’s decline progressed. It wasn’t difficult to influence my father. Alzheimer’s had gradually eroded his keen judgment and every clear boundary he had set for himself. I didn’t understand what coercion was, and I never heard of coercive control until I began studying my father, his disease, and his relationship with Marie. The signs were subtle.
“In coercive control, the abuser seeks to isolate the victim. The pattern of behavior or actions used by a perpetrator is used to frighten, threaten, oppress, and limit their victim. A perpetrator will work to isolate and intimidate their partner to the point where their partner’s isolation from others and dependence on them gives them an immense feeling of power and control.”
Marie monitored my father’s phone calls with me. She was always in the background on speaker, filling in the gaps when he forgot a word or his train of thought. And never left my father’s side when I visited.
One afternoon, while watching TV with them, a commercial about receiving a check came on. It seemed to jog my father’s memory. My father asked, “Marie, didn’t we just get a check?”
She hesitated. Then said, “No.”
Alzheimer’s gave Marie leverage. As my father became more impaired, Marie grew more emboldened. In a twisted form of gaslighting, Marie turned my father’s lucid moment into a memory that never happened. I didn’t know who to believe. One morning, she left with my father, took out the trash, and put a fresh bag in the basket. I went to throw away something when I saw a piece of paper on top. I picked it up. The note was made out to Marie by the postwoman, Linda. She wrote, “I will continue to hold Jack’s mail.” Marie kept my father’s mail from me, on purpose.
I discovered after my father’s death that my father’s out-of-the-blue statement to Marie, “Didn’t we just get a check?” wasn’t a figment of his imagination. His moment of clarity was a window of truth. He had been receiving, signing, and cashing many Vanguard checks.
The note in the trash from the postwoman, addressed to Marie, “I will continue to hold Jack’s mail,” confirmed that Marie didn’t want me to see the IRA check expected to arrive at his home while I was staying with him during the month. There was no record of where the cash went.
Our attorney didn’t believe me when I expressed my suspicions of abuse while he was living alone with Marie. This leads me to believe that other family members aren’t always taken seriously when they express their suspicions against another family member. The fact is, coercion, intimidation, and threats against a person with Alzheimer’s are difficult to detect and harder to prove.
A person who intentionally instills fear to threaten and control another person’s actions and what they say is committing abuse. Emotional torment and isolation leave no trail when there are no witnesses or evidence. These crimes become invisible, and prosecuting the abuser is nearly impossible when the victim can’t remember or is too afraid to speak out. The first step in preventing abuse is to spot it. I discovered there are distinct types of abuse. One being isolation.
Marie physically separated my father from my brother and me. She enraged him and tried to make him break off his relationship with us. Then Marie tried to keep him in Florida at the end of his life. She manipulated a rift in his friendship with Murray and blamed it on my father. Marie stopped taking my father to the social events they both once frequented at the clubhouse in their Florida condo community. She monitored every call he made. I believe she did it because she feared the unpredictable lucid moments.
| There is no good reason and no benefit to keeping an Alzheimer’s
diagnosis a secret. Even the shortest duration of time can create an opportunity for abuse, coercion, and exploitation.
I learned important lessons.
I know I could have had a better chance at deterring abuse
1. If my father had disclosed the Alzheimer’s diagnosis to my brother and me within days.
2. If I had contacted a social worker to help my father begin the process of decision-making.
Having a social worker from the onset of diagnosis to mediate advocates, family, and loved ones can help the person with Alzheimer’s in four ways.
1. Evaluation. An Alzheimer’s diagnosis comes with many decisions to make. An experienced social worker can help advocates, family, and loved ones, look at and discuss all possible solutions, not just one.
2. Communication through mediation. The structure of mediation gives the person with Alzheimer’s, advocates, family members, and loved ones a supportive environment where all can speak and be heard. The power of persuasion is neutralized.
Decisions by the person with Alzheimer’s can be made without feeling cornered or pressured by one person’s beliefs and opinions on what they should do. These meetings support everyone.
3. Documentation through routine mediation protects the decisions of a person with Alzheimer’s through validation. Mediation keeps everyone up to date on the changing needs of the person. Ultimately, these meetings will strengthen, protect, and reinforce the person’s financial, medical, and personal decisions.
4. The byproduct of these group meetings is transparency. And transparency naturally creates a system of checks and balances, which reduces the risk of financial loss, questionable changes to medical, or long-term decisions, extortion, abuse, and neglect.
| Elder abuse is hard even for a physician or nurse to detect when a patient has Alzheimer's.
For example: I went down to my father’s house for the nurse's initial visit. Marie sat at the kitchen table when I explained to the nurse I wanted updates after their visits, which she agreed to. After the nurse went over each medication with Marie, she asked why the memantine prescription had a substantial number of pills left in the bottle. Marie had been told by the nurse that my father needed to take them twice daily, the required dosage prescribed on the bottle. Marie acknowledged she was aware of the dosage. She knew what the medication was for, yet she didn’t give it to him.
Memantine was the Alzheimer’s drug for memory enhancement. It was prescribed by his Alzheimer’s physician. I was at the appointment with Marie and my husband when he went over the dosage with her and us.
Marie took it upon herself to cut it in half. Memantine wasn’t a cure. It didn’t stop or reverse Alzheimer’s; it helped to improve memory and awareness.
Because the nurse corrected Marie, I thought she’d give him the accurate dosage. But I found out two months later that she had continued to cut his memory enhancement dosage in half.
My father’s cognitive impairment was severely impaired during the last five months of his life. Marie drove and took my father everywhere, including his primary care physician appointments. My father relied on Marie. He didn’t retain information, and he confused instructions. The primary care physician decided on my father’s healthcare based on Marie’s beliefs, opinions, and her narrative of me. When I looked at my father’s medical records, I discovered that the primary care physician had noted family tension. The daughter has power of attorney and is the health care proxy. She does not agree with the treatment course for the father and wife. But my father’s medical decisions were his. Marie and my father did not make joint medical care decisions. And the physician, without discussing it with me or the three of us together, made an opinion solely based on what Marie told her. The physician formed an opinion and a belief based on partial information.
• Marie deliberately and willfully cut my father’s dosage of memantine in half. My father relied solely on Marie, who was his caretaker, to give him his medications. The medication she cut in half prevented my father from having the full benefit of memantine. Studies have shown that this drug increases memory, awareness, and concentration.
This drug might have allowed him to recall a memory, what was happening at the moment, and to calm the agitation he felt after sundown. But Marie willfully deprived him of the full dosage, lowering his chances of it ever happening.
“Willful deprivation is a type of elder abuse. It means denying an older adult medication, medical care, shelter, food, a therapeutic device, or other physical assistance, and exposing that person to the risk of physical, mental, or emotional harm—except when the older, competent adult has expressed a desire to go without such care.” From the National Council on Aging, “Get the Facts on Elder Abuse.”
| Sharing our stories helps us to heal from these horrific tragedies. I used the pain and anger I felt as fuel to find answers for others in my book. My father was an ordinary man. As a Boston firefighter, he risked his life to save others, and now, after his death, he continues to help protect others through his story.
I know we can protect our parents, grandparents, and aging loved ones who are in decline when we learn how.
| Yes | Yes | Yes | Thank you for this opportunity to share my story.
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